If there was ever a word that sounds like what it means, it's the word quarreling. Mom used to say to my brothers and me, "Boys, stop your quarreling!" Maybe you want to say that to people in your church, at your place of work, or on the home owner's association board.  

A quarrel is an altercation marked by a break in friendly relations. It's different, for example, than a debate on the floor of the United States Congress, which is supposed to be more civil.

Colleagues can disagree. So can members of the same family. But when an honest debate turns into a quarrel, nobody wins. James asks, "What causes fights and quarrels among you?" (James 4:1) 

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